How relationships work:
I like your butt.
However, I can notice other butts. They can be nice too.But your butt is my favourite butt. It’s the nicest butt. Because it’s mine. And I can touch it.
More you might like
turns ons:
- touchin my butt
- touchin ur butt
turn offs:
- no butt touchin
My philosophy is yoselfism
1. Love yo’ self
2. Accept yo’ self
3. Treat yo’ self
*treats myself*
bank account: maybe don’t do that anymore
*treats self again*
bank account: for real this time quit playin
*treats self again*
bank account: ….bruh
Zodiac at Their Worst
Aries - Bossy ass bitches
Taurus - Boring couch potato
Gemini - Lying gossip
Cancer - Whiny troublemaker
Leo - Self obsessed asshole
Virgo - Hypocritical bitch
Libra - Two faced manipulator
Scorpio - Raging psychopath
Sagittarius - Self-righteous asshole
Capricorn - Social climbing backstabber
Aquarius - Unemotional God complex
Pisces - Manipulative drug addict
what if all the scenerios we make up in our head are actually real events happening in an alternative universe and we’re actually connecting with our alternate self’s mind
my alternate self is getting some serious dick
Who the fuck named the Sahara Desert anyway
Sahara is just the Arabic word for “deserts”
You fucking named it the Desert Desert
way to fucking go
chai tea
I’ll take “European Imperialists Who Never Bothered To Translate The Local Languages” for $200, Alex.
"Soviet" means "union"
The Union Union
We’re good at this.
the inside of your butt is warm enough to hardboil an egg
oh no I’m not falling for this one again
what
